Admit...... Admit....... that is all there is to do....admit..
Admit to God..................
That part was fairly easy once I saw that He was there all the time and He saw every transgression, sin and wrong that I had committed since the beginning. I had pretended that He didn't see, that He wasn't there, or I devised some other form of self induced blindness to allow me the privacy to sin. I now can identify with David,
Psa 51:3 For I know my transgressions; And my sin is ever before me.
Psa 51:4 Against thee, thee only, have I sinned, And done that which is evil in thy sight; That thou mayest be justified when thou speakest, And be clear when thou judgest.
Admit to myself............
That part was fairly easy in that I am the constant in all of the accounting of "wrongs" The hard part was the being thorough and remembering as much as I could. It was hard to admit what I did, to fully take responsiblility each and every "wrong". Very dirty work.
To Admit to another.........
My sponsor is on another continent, so I wrote all of the "wrongs", my sins, in very detailed form and made my admissions to him via the email. Now there is someone else on God's blue planet that knows the full extent of my shame. It was a struggle to let go, and let someone else know. Now that it is done, how do I feel? Do I feel better? Do I feel worse? The answer is both!
I know that God's justice demand death for the sins that I have committed. I know that Jesus paid that price for me. Praise the Great Love that has set me free !!!!!!!!!! \o/
Trev